I had such a great discussion with Tembi Locke for this episode. I met Tembi at Camp Widow years ago, and I’m so glad I did. She’s an actor and now a New York Times bestselling author. Her first book – From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home – was recently published by Simon and Schuster and is one of Reese Witherspoon’s picks for her book club.
Tembi and I sat down to talk recently about her journey, including:
What she learned as a caregiver to her husband for 10 years;
Her service and advocacy work through The Kitchen Widow;
What food and connection at her mother-in-law’s table in Sicily has meant to her and her daughter in their grief;
Tembi’s tips for incorporating food into celebrations and memories, including simple tips for when cooking from scratch feels out of reach;
Her thoughts on showing up for her daughter, even when she wasn’t necessarily convinced that she could show up for herself;
Her a-ha moment in realizing that she and her daughter – though they both lost the same person – have very different experiences based on their different relationships to that person;
The idea that kids’ grief is primarily looking ahead at what they’re missing while adults’ grief is looking back at what they lost;
How helpful it’s been for her to talk with friends who lost their dads when they were young;
The relationship between anxiety and grief, and her experience with this; and
Her desire to continue to show her daughter the world, both literally and in terms of preparing her for the world she will be living in.
I hope you enjoy my discussion with Tembi Locke.
Links & resources for this episode
From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home, by Tembi Locke
Tembi’s web site
The Kitchen Widow
Tembi on IMDb
Tembi’s TEDx talk – What Forty Steps Taught Me About Love and Grief
To commemorate a loved one’s death, some turn to the comfort and memories of food, The Washington Post, June 3, 2019
Red wine infused sea salt recipe
Reese Witherspoon’s book club
Anxiety: The Missing Stage of Grief, by Claire Bidwell Smith
More links for listeners
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Jenny’s interview on the Life Through Transitions podcast
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